{"product_id":"classic-tote-bag-4","title":"Tiny Animal Life Lessons™ - Pretend You're Dead Tote Bag","description":"\u003cp data-start=\"57\" data-end=\"208\" class=\"PDq2pG_selectionAnchorContainer\"\u003eCarry your essentials with the quiet confidence of a possum who understands that not every problem deserves your time, energy, or emotional investment.\u003cspan aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"PDq2pG_selectionAnchor\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"210\" data-end=\"460\"\u003eWhether you're heading to the grocery store, the library, work, or into a meeting that absolutely could have been an email, this sturdy cotton tote serves as a gentle reminder that sometimes the healthiest response isn't to fight, flee, or overthink.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"462\" data-end=\"494\"\u003eSometimes the answer is simpler.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"496\" data-end=\"516\"\u003ePretend you're dead.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"518\" data-end=\"744\"\u003eFeaturing our signature \u003cstrong data-start=\"542\" data-end=\"582\"\u003eTiny Animal Life Lessons™ Collection\u003c\/strong\u003e possum badge design, this eco-conscious tote combines practicality with surprisingly effective survival strategies developed over millions of years of evolution.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"746\" data-end=\"975\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"746\" data-end=\"758\"\u003eWarning:\u003c\/strong\u003e Carrying this bag does not legally authorize ignoring phone calls, avoiding awkward conversations, or becoming mysteriously unavailable when someone says, \"Can I ask you a quick favor?\" It may, however, encourage it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"977\" data-end=\"980\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-section-id=\"1d7mrtu\" data-start=\"982\" data-end=\"993\"\u003eFeatures\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"994\" data-end=\"1262\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"1y961ns\" data-start=\"994\" data-end=\"1048\"\u003eReinforced stitching on handles for extra durability\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"2mmnrc\" data-start=\"1049\" data-end=\"1094\"\u003eLarge printable area on both front and back\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"u6xrsw\" data-start=\"1095\" data-end=\"1123\"\u003e10 litre carrying capacity\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"a1obck\" data-start=\"1124\" data-end=\"1262\"\u003ePerfect for books, groceries, craft supplies, emotional baggage, emergency snacks, and responsibilities you're planning to revisit later\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-section-id=\"10kmwe5\" data-start=\"1264\" data-end=\"1276\"\u003eMaterials\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1277\" data-end=\"1320\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"1qpno1d\" data-start=\"1277\" data-end=\"1290\"\u003e100% cotton\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"10aud5\" data-start=\"1291\" data-end=\"1320\"\u003e3–5 oz\/yard² (100–170 g\/m²)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-section-id=\"1fiolqa\" data-start=\"1322\" data-end=\"1348\"\u003eImportant Printing Note\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1350\" data-end=\"1485\"\u003eOur circular badge artwork is specifically designed to print beautifully across a variety of tote colors for clean, consistent results.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-section-id=\"iqxnfq\" data-start=\"1487\" data-end=\"1500\"\u003eProduction\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1502\" data-end=\"1570\"\u003eThis product is made to order with no minimum purchase requirements.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whimsy Unhinged","offers":[{"title":"White","offer_id":44533019148330,"sku":"d01b00f9-74cf-40f7-bfdc-9a234c1c0b97","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Natural","offer_id":44533019181098,"sku":"d5ff7502-16ba-4347-9df4-76a8283b3445","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red","offer_id":44533019213866,"sku":"a4e2072d-d224-40f3-9165-4c6df17fa98f","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black","offer_id":44533019246634,"sku":"2977b311-c673-458d-9364-714caa626ada","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy","offer_id":44533019279402,"sku":"b97b673a-0bfc-40c1-ab06-955019ac6d30","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0717\/5497\/3226\/files\/bfd26a7b-d5df-4a6a-af7b-f42cfd903d4d.webp?v=1783201553","url":"https:\/\/whimsyunhinged.com\/products\/classic-tote-bag-4","provider":"Whimsy Unhinged","version":"1.0","type":"link"}